Recently, my mother-in-law inquired as to why I have yet to write about her and her side of the family. Well, despite what you may be thinking it isn’t because I fear doing so would hurt our relationship, or taint her and her family’s view of me. In all truth, the reason is because nobody would likely believe what I would write.
It is so commonplace and typical to overhear running jokes from people regarding their “in-laws” — ugh, what a terrible word that is (apparently). But I actually enjoy my husband’s family and in fact, I find welcomed comfort being around any and all of them.
And, because I understand that this isn’t a similar sentiment held by others towards their spouse’s parents and family, I have steered clear of broaching the topic…until now that is.
You see, good people deserve recognition.
Good mothering deserves admiration.
And good mother-in-lawing, well, that truly deserves an award.
I fully understand that I am not this woman’s child, and I fully understand that she has two grown male children of her own.
Thinking of my son, I can imagine how somewhat sad, worrisome, and generally hard it must be to turn over the reins of care and love for your child to another — one who is not you, who did not birth this baby, who does not know this little man and what he has been through his whole life, who cannot appreciate fully how much this big guy has grown, and who doesn’t and will never be able to match the feelings a mother feels for her son.
I am not you. Thankfully, for you, for me, and for your son, I am not here to serve your purpose, and I am not here to take your place. I have my own place and purpose in your son’s heart and arms, but now and forever there will be enough space in both for you as well.
Like I said, I can imagine how tough this would be and I sure as hell am not looking forward to the time when my own son is grown — how could he ever find a woman who will love him as much as I? But, the frightening thing for me is I actually know that he will, just as I love his father.
One day I will feel like you. I will feel somewhat happy, somewhat sad, and most definitely confused about the myriad of feelings. But, if ever one of my children falls in love, I can only hope to have the genuine, respectful, supportive, and unconditional relationship with their significant other, as I have with you.
You see people complain about their “in-laws” all of the time because most in-laws are not like you. I hit the jackpot.
So, why should you never write about your mother-in-law? Because if you are saying something kind, no one will believe you. And all I’ve got to say are a bunch of reasons why I am grateful for mine.